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Seconding Niklas’s answer. But, I will add that it takes a lot of mental training to reach a stage where you can truly accept this, so don’t beat yourself up if it doesn’t just fall into place for you. Instead, you may want to talk to your friend about your mixed feelings.
Chances are they’ll be willing to hear you out, and they’ll understand you, so at least you’ll have that - and, it goes a long way. Step two is to train yourself not to need your crush’s approval, and also that their relationship has nothing to do with you and everything to do with your crush and with your friend. I’d also suggest dating other people. As many as you can handle at first, to take your mind off anything negative. Eventually you’ll find one that sticks, and soon after that, you’ll see that your relationship with that new person in your life has nothing to do with your old crush.
I’m assuming a bit with this answer, so hopefully these suggestions are pertinent. These are all things that have helped me in the past. Good luck!
If *my* best friend is dating my crush, great! Awesome! I hope they hit off really well, especially if they have an established relationship already.
As for myself, I will continue to play video games, eat food, take dumps, sleep, watch videos of kittens and puppies on Youtube, date women*, post on Quora, work on my projects, run two companies, do stuff and things.
I don’t actually understand your question at all. Your crush is just a crush. If your best friend is dating her, isn’t that just smack-in-your-face obvious? You do you. They do them. Not that difficult really… Right? o_O Also, reading your comment about “getting over her, you’ve tried already” - well, that’s just a fact of life. Maturity helps.
;) Disclaimer: * “date women” on the notion that I am single, in context of this question. ^_^ What you should do is live and learn. When you see a diamond, you should be willing to make the effort needed to pick it up. Instead, you decided to stand around and admire it.
You did nothing to make that precious gem yours. Now, you see someone else with the gem you wished you had. So vow to do better going forward. When you see something you want, promise yourself you’ll take the steps needed to make your dreams come true. That way, at least if you fail, you’ll always know you did your best.
best if your re dating my best friend shmuel myself - If You're Dating My Best Friend Then You're Dating Me Too Make Sure Buy 2 of Everything Because I Get Jealous
If you've developed feelings for one of your best friends, you know how scary it can be. Should you tell your friend you're in love with them? What happens if they don't love you back - will you lose their friendship? Get the answers to these questions and more. (The only answer I don't have is whether or not they like you back. You'll have to find that one out on your own.) ONOKY - Fabrice LEROUGE/ Brand X Pictures/ Getty Images There's a difference between having a passing crush on someone and truly being in love.
For instance, if: • You're from another relationship • Your friend is on the rebound and acting vulnerable • Your friend got a new style and has been looking extra cute lately • Your friend just started dating someone, and they're spending less time with you • Someone said that you and your friend would make a cute couple • You and your friend became close only recently Then you might just have a temporary crush on your friend.
Give it a couple of weeks and see if those feelings disappear on their own. If they do, you'll be relieved that you never said anything. Continue to 2 of 4 below. Even if you're sure of your feelings, you shouldn't necessarily reveal them to your friend.
Don't drop the bomb under any of these circumstances: • If they're , it would be unfair to sabotage their relationship by sharing your feelings.
• If you're in a relationship, you need to decide who's more important to you. If your friend wins out, then you should break up with your bf/gf no matter what. It's not fair to date someone who's only 2nd place in your heart.
• If your friend's going through some major stress - like if they've got a big game or test coming up, or if they're coping with the death of a relative - hold your tongue until their stress has passed. It would be selfish of you to throw them one more bowling pin to juggle. Continue to 3 of 4 below. So you've decided that you really do love your friend and that the timing is right.
Here are some tips on how to tell them the big news: • Don't just blurt it out in the middle of a conversation. Plan on a time and place where you can be alone with them, face to face. • Look in their eyes and drop the bomb with a short statement like, "I'm beginning to like you as more than a friend." • Don't use the word "love," even if you're sure you're feeling it. "Love" is a big word, and you might scare your friend off whether they have feelings for you or not.
• Keep your tone upbeat. If you act like you're revealing something horrible to them, they might react like it's bad news.
By having this conversation with your friend, you've made the decision that it's more important to reveal your feelings than to live a lie by hiding them any longer. Even if your friend doesn't like you back, you're still better off than you were before, because now you know how they feel about you. (I know, I know...it doesn't feel like much of a consolation prize.) Your friend is probably hoping that you'll both be able to forget this conversation ever happened and go back to being friends.
That might not be so easy for you. If it hurts too much to hang around your friend, take some time to . You might be able to be friends again down the road, but don't rush it. Do what's best for your heart.
• • 4 years ago • Wedding: June 2015 Okay so if your former best friend has been asking for forgiveness like crazy and then turned around and started a relationship with your ex, would you find it as her being two faced or would it not bother you at all? Story behind this is, last July my former bff and I got into an argument over her talking behind my back and she just said some things I can’t forgive her for.
She’d been messaging my mom trying to get a hold of me and trying to make up for it but then out of the blue she was in a committed relationship with one of my exes. Well now they’re not together and she’s back to messaging my mom trying to get a hold of me again.
To me she isn’t a real friend if she’s going to talk about me the way she did let alone date an ex. Personally I think its gross to sleep with a friend’s ex. I don’t know I’m probably crazy, I just have this thing where I think sharing genitals with someone you know is gross. I prefer not to know my SO’s sex history. Anyway I’m digressing, please let me know your thoughts??
• • 4 years ago Thoughts: When I was in highschool, we actually have an “understanding” in my own clique that dating each others’ exes is a big No-No.
Not because we think that’s gross, but we realize that falling in love is not completely uncontrollable. I find that if I know someone is my friend’s ex, that’s enough incentive for me to emotionally distant myself. RE: FRIENDZONED Opinion: Not knowing the backstory to this, I guess my opinion is that if you don’t want her as a friend, then don’t let her be your friend.
Instead of avoiding her, it might be best to talk to her yourself and say it to her face. It saves her the time to call, it saves your energy, and it eliminates unnecessary drama that you bring to your parent’s door. With regards to her dating your ex, that’s your own philosophy. If it’s gross to you, then you have the right to be grossed out by it. For me, I would be uncomfortable, but if I haven’t dated this EX since highschool then I would really not care.
• • 4 years ago Well you were not talking to each other because you were mad so technically you were not friends at the time. Anyways still gross that she would do that. I would be very uncomfortable dating and sleeping with a man that my friend has been with.
Oh well not your friend anymore right? So who cares….. it’s all in the past. i actually have a friend that is like this. It’s kinda gross her slut bf slept with many women pkus her cousin at one point and then they dated anyways.
There is way more to the story but still i listened to this man talk about how amazing the cousins boobs were and now he is with my friend. The cousin is a total whore. I guess it’s always good to keep it in the family. To each their own right? Laugh it off girl. Thinking about that stuff just makes me laugh. • • 4 years ago Imo, I think it matters how long you date the ex. You said you’ve slept with him so I’m guessing it was serious. If it was like a month fling, then no I don’t really see a problem with it since chances are you guys didn’t really like each other.
If you were really serious with him and had an awful break up, then he definitely should have been off the table to her. I think that this friend doesn’t really sound like a friend and either way you should just let the friendship sink and move on.
• • 4 years ago My first thought is: Who cares? You don’t want to be friends with this girl, you presumably don’t want to get back with your ex, so who cares if they date? Does it really effect you at all? Why let it? Personally if I had a friend who made such poor decisions to want to get with my ex then I feel sorry for her, but I don’t really care who my exes date or who wants to date them.
• • 4 years ago I wouldn’t care if someone dated my ex unless it meant this friend was bringing my ex into the same social circle. I’m not offended by the notion of them having sex or a relationship, but neither do I want to have to see my ex all the time in social situations. A much bigger issue for me is that you say she said ‘unforgivable’ things to you.
It’s hard to judge without knowing what was said to you, but I understand not being overly specific about it on a public message board- I assume it went well beyond typical heat-of-the-moment anger….ie if someone called me an unreasonable bitch or something during an argument, I’m sure I’d get over it, but if someone said something really low or cruel to me it’s not just that you can’t un-hear something like that, but it would make me question this nasty side to her character that revealed itself.
So if what she said was unforgivably bad, this friendship may be damaged beyond repair by it. Also, it’s your decision whether you try to work things out with her or not- she needs to stop pestering your mom about it. • • 4 years ago • Wedding: December 2012 You straight up said you can’t forgive her, so why does it matter what any of us think? You won’t put this away either way. IMO, it’s two people who are in my past. If I have no desire to have any contact with them, it doesn’t matter what I do.
If I am still actively friends with someone, yeah, don’t date my exes, that’s kind of screwed up. But if I’m not friends with either of them, then who cares? Whether youâ€™re in a wedding or going to one, thereâ€™s something here for everyone. Find support, ask questions, swap stories, and follow brides planning real weddings here on Weddingbee.
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BEST FRIEND CHOSE MY EX OVER ME: STORYTIME